This is the episode that makes everyone think, "Did I miss an episode?"
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| "Wait, Hotaru's a GIRL!?" |
Hotaru paid off all her thousands in host club destructo-debts, so she no longer has to play survival games with Toygungun Gun Gun Gungun! Makes sense, seeing as we've seen a grand total of one gunfight so far. It's no dream sequence. It's just a third episode doing a good third of what you'd normally expect the finale to do. Sh-sh-sh-shocking!
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| hey just like me |
It's been a while since this happened, and Hotaru has returned to everyday life. But the
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| That's the face of a once-proud warrior who has since resigned herself to sleeping all day and lasagna. |
But if you'll recall, Hotaru is far from any normal human, what with all the yelling, ridiculous jump-kicks, and general straight-woman extremity.
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| Be honest with yourself, that's a pack of lies. Do you not see the face-caressing freak in front of you? |
Switch really wants to show Hotaru the magic of guns so she'll join the team again, this time semi-voluntarily, but nothing's working! So he steals a policeman's gun and then gets himself dragged off to the slammer.
Meanwhile, Hotaru gets a letter sent to the wrong address and it leads her to this creepy apartment with a conspicuously-open door and a gun on the floor, which she promptly blushes at as if they were lost lovers.
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| This is almost video game logic. |
She goes in completely uninvited and unannounced and...surprise surprise! Somebody's angry that she came into their place!
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| Messing with a cop's weapons? Ooh, that's bad. Put 'im behind bars. Five minutes. |
But! Surprise surprise surprise! This was all a set-up to get her to look at guns and blush again!
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| I've Got Two awful Dads! |
We cut away to meet some new characters. They may take time after work to go to the local gun club, but what fuels their hobby is work at a pediatric ward. Aw, how beautiful. And what a happy job it is.
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| "I wish he'd just die." - actual quote, nurse |
We're introduced to Toy Gun Gun's official rivals, who I will just call the Pediatrics Ward. It's gonna be just like Eyeshield 21, only for kids, only not for kids at all! Meet Cool Doctor and Gross Doctor.
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| You'd think the gross one would be the doctor with molds and cultures for hair. |
Okay we're done meeting them. Who's up for some gun lovin'?
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| Hey, quit cheatin' on Hotaru! |
Before they get back to the gun range, they're going to reinstate Hotel's gun-ffection in full by taking her to buy her very own armament. But to make sure it's all straight and legal, she's going with the ero-manga glasses Switch dude who will join her just as soon as he finishes buying his stupid ero-games (viewer discretion is advised, always ask your parent's permission before going online, like, comment, subscribe). Who can be THE BEST. IN JAPAN. without one of those babies, eh? Also, to make sure it's all straight, but certainly not legal, one of the employees does this to her.
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| Thanks. |
That's Cool Doctor from Pediatrics Ward!! He's such a charmer! He tells people that small guns are for women because no women ever work out. Number one on every lovely lady's list already! He also tells them other super-informative stuff like the fact that if you run around a lot, you should not use a long gun, because long guns are heavy. Magnificent insight.
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| Waitwaitwait, Hotaru's a GIRL!?!? |
She goes to the counter to pay with the money in the envelope, just as was agreed upon...but uh-oh! Is this the wrong envelope or something? It's only got one thousand yen in it! And to make matters worse, now the rugged manager is pulling her into a mystery fun-zone to "test [your] abilities" and "see which gun is really right for [her]" because she said a code word that she didn't even know what it do! Whotta pickle! Whotta highly-illegal pickle! How's the glasses guy gonna save this one!? Oh!? He's going to continue a years-long blood feud with Cool Doctor!?!? And get creamed like corn!?!?!?!?
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| NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! |
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| At least I can now say with certainty that inevitably at one point or another, every character in this show needs a good shot in the head. |
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